From Stella, your emotional wellness AI

Caregiver quiz: no score, no level

Seven questions about the week you're carrying, read back as a card.

Question 1 of 7 7 questions · a few minutes · your answers aren't saved

What did this week ask of you?

Your answers come back here as a card. No score, no label.

Updated By the Stella team

How it works

Take this caregiver quiz to see your week in your own words. Seven questions ask what you're carrying, what you've dropped, who could take something and what you've stopped saying. It takes a few minutes and gives no score or label, and one card reads it all back with the one thing you picked to hand off or say.

  1. Answer seven questions about this week

    Tap a quick pick or write your own answer. Every question is about the week you actually had, and any of them can stay blank.

  2. Pick one thing

    The last question asks for one thing to hand off or say out loud this week. Small counts, like asking for one evening or telling someone you're tired.

  3. Keep your card

    Your answers come back as one card, in your words. You can copy it or print it. Nothing on it is a score, a level or advice.

Example results: three made-up weeks

Each card below is made up, written for this page to show what you get back. None of them is a real person's week.

Example written for this page

Her texts start before six

This week asked for: Being on call. Her texts start before six.

Dropped to make room: Seeing friends. I've cancelled so often they've stopped asking.

An afternoon of your own: See a friend. A real lunch, not a call from the car.

When you picture it: Guilt first, then relief, then more guilt.

Could take one thing: My brother. He lives an hour away and calls on Sundays.

Stopped saying out loud: “I can't do every weekend.”

One thing this week: Ask my brother to take one Saturday a month.

Example written for this page

Looking after a partner, and missing them

This week asked for: Every decision. Meals, the calendar, what to tell people.

Dropped to make room: Work hours. I went part-time in the spring.

An afternoon of your own: Go somewhere. Anywhere without a list.

When you picture it: Worry. What if something happens while I'm out.

Could take one thing: A friend. She's offered twice and I said we're fine.

Stopped saying out loud: “I miss us.”

One thing this week: Say yes the next time she offers.

Example written for this page

Two parents, one job, no one to swap with

This week asked for: All of it. Two parents, two sets of appointments.

Dropped to make room: Sleep, mostly.

When you picture it: Resentment, and then I feel bad for feeling it.

Could take one thing: No one yet.

Stopped saying out loud: “I'm angry, and it isn't at them.”

One thing this week: Tell one person how tired I am.

You skipped the afternoon question. Some weeks there isn't room for every question.

Questions to ask yourself when you're looking after someone

When you're looking after a parent, a partner or anyone who needs a lot from you, it helps to ask yourself seven things about the week you actually had. Here's why each question helps. You can answer them on paper too.

What did this week ask of you?
Naming what the week actually took makes the load visible, including the parts no one else sees, like being on call or answering the same question again.
What have you dropped to make room for it?
What you've let go of is part of what caring takes from you, and it's easy to stop noticing. Writing it down keeps it from disappearing.
If you had one afternoon that was only yours, what would you do with it?
Wanting your own life back is not the same as wanting out. A small, specific answer is easier to make room for than a vague one.
When you picture an afternoon that's only yours, what comes up?
Guilt and relief can arrive together when you picture time for yourself. Naming both is more honest than picking the one you think is allowed.
Who could take one thing off you, even a small one?
Handing off one small thing is a different ask from asking for help with everything. If the answer is no one yet, that's worth seeing in writing too.
What have you stopped saying out loud?
When you're the one holding it together, some sentences stop getting said. Writing one down is a way of hearing it first.
What's one thing you want to hand off or say this week?
One thing is small enough to try this week without fixing the rest. You pick it, and the card only reads it back.

When talking it through helps

A card shows what you said. It can't ask what all of it looked like on Tuesday, or why the guilt got there before the relief. That's usually the part worth saying out loud to someone.

Stella is your emotional wellness AI. You can tell her what happened this week, by voice or text, and she helps you find the words for the ask you keep putting off. She's for your side of it, not their care.

Questions about this quiz

Will this quiz tell me if caregiving has worn me out?

No. The quiz has no score, no level and no label at the end. You answer seven questions about this week in your own words, and the page reads them back as a card, with the one thing you picked to hand off or say. What it adds up to is yours to decide.

Does this quiz add anything up?

No. This quiz measures nothing: it gives no score or level and compares you with no one. It asks what the week took, what you've dropped, who could take something and what you've stopped saying, then gives your own words back as a card to copy or print.

Is it wrong to want time for myself?

Wanting time that's yours while you look after someone you love isn't the same as loving them less. The two can sit side by side. One question here asks what comes up when you picture an afternoon to yourself, and guilt, relief and resentment are all fair answers to put on the card.

What if there's no one to hand anything to?

Then put no one yet on your card. It's an honest answer, and it's useful to see in writing. The last question asks for one thing to hand off or say, and saying counts: telling one person how tired you are is something you can do this week, even before anyone takes anything.

How long does the quiz take?

A few minutes. There are seven short questions, each with quick picks to tap, and you can skip any of them. Every question is about your side of it, not their care, so it gives no care or medical advice. At the end your answers come back as a card to copy or print.